I’ve found that if I want to experience real change, and enjoy something new, I have to stop doing the same old things. I have to make room for whatever is on the way. So, I stopped searching for excitement, and resisted forming new entanglements. I even stopped shopping.
And what has happened? Nothing yet. This is the strangest time I can remember going through; “serene” is the word that comes to mind. I’m tranquil yet I feel vaguely guilty. Shouldn’t I be doing more? Others are complaining about how busy they are, how there isn’t enough time in the day to do all the things they want to do. Me, I’m slowly riding my bicycle through the alleys of Chiang Mai, stopping every once in a while to get something to eat, or get a massage. I go swimming a few times a week. I read a lot. Ho hum. When’s the adventure part kick in?
I don’t think it’s going to. In fact, I think I’ve already experienced enough superficial adventure to last two lifetimes. Time to become mellow and insightful, or at least fake it for a while. Maybe I’ll fake it until I make it.
Mabe Ill keep working.